Complete Eighth
How can I help my friend with closure?
I have a friend who's Dad died a few years back in fifth grade. She is now in eighth and is still sad about his death. She can barely get through a holiday without feeling in a complete wreck. I recommended closure but the therapists at our school are crap. What can I do? It tears me apart to see my friend so sad like that.
You might not be able to help her as well as a therapist can but there are a few things You Can do.
If she's open to talking about it, be willing to listen. Maybe spend a day talking about how it happened, how she learned about it, and how she was feeling at the time. Maybe spend some time reminiscing about some of the great things about him and talk about other holidays they had together. Come up with an idea where she can honor her dad during the holidays, something that would make him happy. Try to get all the pain out and then start looking at the good stuff he had to offer and how he'd want to be remembered.
It will take a lot of investment on your end and it might not be something she's willing to go through. You'll also need to be careful as to the timing of transitioning from sad memories into happier ones.
I've had a lot of experience with helping friends get closure but nothing as big as a parent's death. (Parents splitting up, death of a pet, death of a foster brother, and break ups are my experience and that's the blueprint I kinda use.)
Good Luck, and thanks for looking out for your friend.
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